From This Side of Thirty: Happy Birthday Cassie: Girl's Road Trip Edition

It’s been 52 days since I turned 31. Which means today we celebrate Cassie’s special day! Happy happy happy birthday DAY! I have plans to make it one to remember, but I won’t get ahead of myself ;) Wouldn’t want to ruin a good surprise!

In my last post I set the stage for our special trip we took a couple of weeks ago. I cannot remember the last time in my life I anticipated something with as much excitement and delight as I did looking forward to this night away…just Cassie and me.

Months ago, Cassie sent me a screenshot of a Facebook post announcing a book signing by our very favorite blogger/author, Melanie Shankle…in DALLAS!!! She didn’t really pose a question in the text because we both knew, come hell or high water, we were THERE. Turns out, the signing was on a Thursday at 7pm. Not the best day or time for us, but like I said… we’d be first in line if it were scheduled for 3am Christmas Day.

The week leading up to our departure we planned our outfits, got Melanie and Gulley a little gift, packed our suitcases, and counted down the minutes until we left our mom lives behind for a little over 24 hours. We would leave around lunchtime on Thursday, take her car because it can hold more retail souvenirs, do a little shopping, eat dinner, meet Melanie, sleep…til noon maybe, shop more, then head home. Cassie’s husband Chris was even kind enough to clean her car and put some tissue in the glove box just in case a “hormone fest” erupted. His words.

The forecast predicted some really treacherous storms when our day came. So, because…safety first, Cassie (with the hub’s support) decided her worn tires wouldn’t be the best idea on wet roads. She spent far more time at the tire shop than she hoped that morning which left me waiting very patiently, or the exact opposite of that, at my house. We got away just after noon and we were off! Finally!

Lacy & Cassie’s Driving Arrangement

There are no hard feelings from any of the above. This works for us. I must say she is much more appreciative than Ole Jus when being reminded she is going 67 in a 55. And my response to both?... YOU ARE WELCOME.

Thanks to my mad navigating skills, we found out that our hotel, the book signing, a large mall, Starbucks and The Cheesecake Factory were all within about a mile radius of one another. Score!

First on the agenda…introduce Cass to Charming Charlie. A store…not a charismatic little man. If you’ve never been, then I’m sorry to inform you that you haven’t been living life to its fullest potential. Shoes, clothing, scarves galore, jewelry in abundance…that’s the Charming Charlie way. She loved it…of course. Here’s one thing you must know about Cass. She always wants to share a dressing room. It actually saves a lot of time and effort because I’m going to need to see everything she tries on and vice versa. Then, if and when you try on a dress and pull your jeans down half way, she’s gonna think it’s funny and need to take a photo to cherish the memory. Bless her.

After only 2 stores (Ulta was the other), we were famished. Not because we had worked up an appetite with all of our dressing and undressing, but because we had completely forgotten to eat lunch. Whole Foods was nearby so we ran inside to pick up a little something. We knew we’d be eating dinner in the next few hours, so we were looking for something lite but tasty. We looked over the salad bar, chips, fruit then it hit me! Sushi! Duh! That’s our go-to meal anyway. There is nothing Cassie and I love more than some grocery store bought sushi we can eat over the console in the car. True class. Yes sir.

We made our way over to the mall where we were on a mission for the perfect boyfriend jean. I was convinced we might find success at Gap. We lost Gap in our local mall a few years ago, and while I wasn’t a faithful shopper, I sure enjoyed some of those jeans…in 1997.

We walked into Gap and they had some of the best looking britches! Jackpot! She and I both picked up quite a few of the boyfriend style and even some of the new girlfriend jeans. Our browsing was interrupted by a salesman. What was unique about this encounter was that I usually do most of the talking, but he took Cassie as his victim and I just watched…

Salesman-“Hi! Sign up for a GapCard today! You get some% off of every purchase.”

Cassie-“Oh, we don’t have a Gap where we live.”

Salesman-“Well it’s good for Banana Republic and Old Navy, too. DO YOU HAVE THE INTERNET?”

Let’s pause here. “Do you have the internet?” “No.” I have never been more proud of her. Out of nowhere she told the man we didn’t have internet. Who doesn’t have internet?! She was making a funny, but for a moment I think he thought we just thawed out from the Ice Age. We all 3 laughed at her little joke and that’s when it happened. Something snuck up on me. I had no previous knowledge of its sudden, unwelcomed arrival…I passed a surge of gas. I laughed with such force the air just popped out! No one heard (or smelled), but as soon as GapCard guy walked away I told Cass and we laughed our way to the dressing room. And let me tell you something…if you ever experience inopportune flatulence, you may consider it to be an omen about something in the near future.

The boyfriend jeans were a disaster. Mine made me look like I was Spongebob Squarepants in denim. For a brief moment I thought I lived in a pineapple under the sea. I couldn’t get them off fast enough (so that Cathy Camera couldn’t capture the catastrophe). But heaven help! When she put those suckers on!...it was almost as unfortunate as the Spongebob fiasco. Every pair seemed to gap (no pun intented) in the crotch. We came to the conclusion right then and there…boyfriend jeans are not for us.

It wasn’t long before we ended up in Barnes & Noble to buy our new books, Nobody’s Cuter Than You. We also grabbed a card for Melanie & Gulley to put in the bag with our little gift (T-shirts from my sister-in-law’s East Texas Magazine, Small Town Kids. Check it out here-smalltownkidsmag.com) We walked to the other end of the block and found a table at The Cheesecake Factory to eat, drink and be merry until the signing rolled around. And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t look around to see if Melanie & Gulley were filling up on pasta and cheesecake before the signing too. Our waiter was a gem. He suggested farfalle pasta…in English-bowties. Why didn’t he just say that to begin with? So I went with the garlic pancetta “far-folly” as I like to call it, and Cassie chose another pasta dish that Meredith, my sister-in-law, recommended… Pasta da Vinci. Last I checked Mr. da Vinci wasn’t a famous chef…but whatever. So when Cass got her plate we had to send Mere a look-at-what-you’re-missing picture. I said, “Take a big ole bite.” Another proud moment.

We left there full of pasta, bread and a couple of “adult” lemonades, and headed back to the car for a quick freshen up. Again…Cathy Camera.

Then a B & N bathroom selfie.

And the moment was upon us! As we made our landing atop the escalator, a man was giving directions about where to sit and how the line was going to move during the signing. It was that moment when I realized I spotted Shaeffer, a fashion/Bachelor blogger Cassie and I adore! Melanie, Gulley and now Shaeffer too!?!? Can’t even take it!!! I had emailed Shaeffer earlier in the day on a whim hoping for a photo op, and she so kindly agreed. I’m telling you some of these writers/bloggers are just good people. And hilarious too.

And then I was speechless! What?!?! She asked where we were from and Cassie totally took the stage on that deal. She told her about 2 hours away to which Shaeffer frowned and said, “Oh no. That’s a long way”, but she quickly caught on by the look on our face when Cassie told her, “Oh no no no! We are making the most of a girls’ road trip and getting away from the kids for a while.” They began to introduce Melanie, so our little visit was cut short. Thank goodness! Since I was suddenly rendered mute. Geez! We used our time waiting to discuss what we were going to say to Melanie when we made our way to her table. I suggested, “Let’s say, ‘Hi, do you recognize us?’ and see how long it takes her to realize we are in the video.” Cassie quickly shot down that option. Then I threw this one out there, “I’ll tell her about that time YOU farted in Gap when we were looking for boyfriend jeans.” She wasn’t too keen on that one either, but we had a pretty good laugh at the thought. My third idea was to invite Melanie & Gulley to visit us this summer on their annual road trip. Again, shot down, but she wasn’t coming up with any winners either.

We spent the next 20 minutes watching all of Melanie’s friends greet each other so sweetly and tenderly. We even got a chance to see Jen, her friend she writes about in the book who is battling cancer for the second time. There was so much joy and love in that room and we were blessed to witness it.

When it was our turn to have our books signed, I just blurted out, “Do you recognize us?” And bless her heart, she stumbled over some yes’s and no’s then finally settled on, “Should I?” Well the answer is NO. You shouldn’t recognize these 2 crazies from your promo video as 2 of 200 faces, but at least I didn’t go the “fart” route. All the while a kind man was using my phone to take pictures of our time with Melanie. The scene tells so much of our personalities. Me-asking an extremely dry humored question with a straight face to a dumbfounded individual, and Cass-laughing because it’s absurd and she totally gets my sense of humor.

They loved the shirts and we were so thankful to have our picture with both of them. I was so pleased that Melanie was intentional about spending a few moments with each person that came through the line that evening.

We left on cloud nine. I called Ole Jus on our way to the hotel,

Me-“It was better than we hoped it would be!”

Me-“The book signing! The reason we came to Dallas!”

Jus-“Oh. I thought that was tomorrow.”

Me-“What?!?! I have been talking about this for months! I don’t even know where we can go from here. I don’t know how we can recover from this.”

In his defense…oh wait! He has no defense. I’m not sure how he completely missed the scheduled climax of our trip, but leave it to Ole Jus!

We made it to the hotel and checked in with one of the worst headaches I’ve had in a long time. After a desperate mix of Advil and Aleve I was finally able to get some sleep. Cass got out of bed around 3 to adjust the thermostat because hotels have a conspiracy to turn off the air conditioner right as you head into REM. When she got up we talked a little about the temperature, she asked about my headache and we drifted back off in a matter of minutes. This may seem like nothing, but to me it’s huge. I’m so used to Justin growling at me when he wakes up, but I am much more like Cassie in that I can jump out of bed at any time of night chipper and fresh…not grunting or snarling.

We didn’t sleep until noon the next day. In fact, I’m not sure we even made it past 9am. We packed and loaded up in the car again for more retail therapy, more dressing room photos and more girl talk with the occasional speed limit reminder mixed in.

All in all it was a successful trip. The signing was everything we hoped it would be and more. The food was superb, and our time together was simply priceless.

Cassie opened this gift earlier today…

It’s a list of famous BFF’s. All of these women, some fictional, have a blast together. They do amazing things, cry countless tears, laugh a ton of laughs, live life to the fullest and give away part of their own heart…as half of a sacred sisterhood. That’s us…Happy Birthday Cass!...FROM THIS SIDE OF THIRTY.